On Aug 22, 10:45 am, Greegor <Greego...@[EMAIL PROTECTED]
> wrote:
> Dan's only alternative solution is to throw ad hom around?
> Grandma's odd comments are "unconditional love" he said.
> (But MORE than the kids she did give birth to?)
> (Where's the unconditional love for them??)
As to unconditional love of the children you give birth to, I'd like
to explain something to you that you probably won't understand.
I'm gonna give it a hell of a shot anyway.
Parent DO love their children unconditionally. (some, anyway, I'm
sure there are parents out there that don't give a whit)
No matter what they do. That's what that means.
It doesn't mean that parents are to tolerate, stand up for, or approve
of bad behavior in their children.
Only that they love them in spite of it.
I will not stand by my children doing wrong.
I tell them 'I love you, but you know what you did was not right, and
I'm not going to pretend that it is.'
Love can be given unconditionally.
Respect, admiration, loyalty, and many others cannot.
You cannot encourage bad behavior in children, but you can still love
them while they behave badly.
You don't have to approve.
You don't have to defend.
All you have to do is love them, and let them know it.
Do you think that a mother who's child is a heroin addict loves what
their child does?
Their addiction is not their child, their child is their child.
A parent can simultaneously hate the addiction that drives their child
to bad behaviors while loving their child at the same time.
An old minister whom I loved deeply once told me that I should always
keep these words in mind while raising my kids:
'A good daddy disciplines his child with one hand, and loves them with
the other.'
Meaning, it is always possible to love your child while not so much
liking the things that they do or approving of them.
Where many parents go wrong is in believing that their child IS the
bad behavior that they present.
They often will despise the behavior, and eventually come to despise
the child because of it.
They can't separate the child from the act.
You're ideas about what unconditional love constitutes is off base
apparently.
>
> Betty suggested CPS should act even though CPS had already
> decided not to. She went on to suggest using all kinds of
> psychological services apparently to "dig for dirt".
> Betty wants them to make a case where there IS NO CASE.
>
> The real story here is indeed how the system sucks
> LIED and twisted this story, to try to use it for an attack.
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